Ephesians 5
25 Husbands, love your wives, …
love:
♦ to have affection based on admiration or benevolence,
♦ in loyalty and unselfish concern to freely accept another and seek their good
Husbands are to love their wives faithfully…
… even as Christ also loved the church, …
in the same manner and with the same kind of love that Jesus Christ has demonstrated for His elect, the Church.
… and gave himself for it;
Jesus Christ gave everything to purchase His bride, and will stop at nothing to protect her and promote His oneness with her. He is as interested in her welfare as He is in His own: she is part of Him.
26 that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
He died for her to separate her to Himself and see her purified and brought to maturity and wholesomeness.
27 that he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
Jesus Christ will present the Church to Himself; He is preparing her for Himself and will work patiently and persistently with her to make her perfectly suited to Himself as His wife. In a sense, He is cultivating her.
28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
In the same manner as Jesus Christ loves the Church, men should love their wives, taking care of their needs even as they take care of themselves. The same affection and interest that a man shows towards his own welfare, both physical, emotional, and spiritual, he should consistently show toward his wife. Since he and his wife are one flesh, and she is dedicated to promoting his welfare, when he blesses and nourishes his wife he makes her all the more capable of being his helper. Her interests and needs should be just as important to him as his own needs, and he should make as much of an effort to satisfy and bless his wife as he makes for himself.
29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
Every man takes regular care of his own physical needs, and is deeply interested in his own personal welfare, in the same manner as Jesus Christ pursues the welfare of the church.
30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
We are part of the body of Jesus Christ, and that is the reason He cares for us with the same interest that He cares for Himself.
31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
Because of the love of Jesus Christ for the Church, and His purpose to become eternally one with her, a man should separate himself from the authority of his family and make a new family with his wife, in which they are to be unified in body, soul, heart, mind, and spirit.
32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
The marriage of a man and a woman is an earthly picture of the marriage of God with His people.
33a Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself …
Even though his marriage is a picture of eternal things, let every husband treat it as reality and make no difference between his own needs and the needs of his wife.
DISCUSSION
What does the word “husbandry” mean? How does this help to define the role of an husband?
What does it mean to be an heir of the grace of life? (1 Pet 3:7)
Does Jesus Christ confront the church over every single sin? (Re 2:24) What does this imply about leadership in holiness? How does it relate to husbandry?
How does a husband practically love his wife as Christ loves the church?:
♦ Always protect her and seek her welfare as his own,
♦ When she is distressed, try – with the same earnestness he would expend if he himself were distressed – to find a way to help her.
♦ Take time to study her, to seek to understand her needs. A woman’s needs are quite different from a man’s. (1 Peter 3:7a)
♦ Honor her frame as the weaker vessel, not demanding of her more than she can reasonably bear. (1 Peter 3:7b)
♦ Teach her and take spiritual responsibility in the marriage. (1 Cor 14)
♦ Bear patiently with her faults. (1 Peter 4:8)
What should the husband do when his wife is persistently defiant, insolent, rebellious, disrespectful, argumentative, critical, condescending, sarcastic, disobedient, contradictory, neglectful, careless or otherwise irreverent? (1 Tim 3:5, 1 Cor 6:7, 1 Peter 3:14, Jas 5:9)
How should the husband demonstrate leadership in the home? (1 Tim 3:12)
What should be the husband’s attitude in the home? (1Co 16:13, Eph 6:10, Col 3:15,19; 2Ti 1:7, Heb 5:2, 1Pe 3:8, 5:5)
♦ bitter: harshly reproachful, sharp and resentful, marked by cynicism and deep-seated ill will
♦ humble: not proud or haughty, not arrogant or assertive or vain, reflecting a state of deference or submission
Further reading: Of Power and Of Love