Hello. Pleased to meet you. Who are you? I do not know.
What do you mean, you “do not know?” I understood from your introduction and question that you would also like to know my name. I do not know it. Perhaps you really wanted to know who I am, yet asked my name instead. I am not my name. I am who I am by my identity, but I did not think this was the answer that you wanted. Please forgive me if I misjudged your question.
Nonsense! Tell me your name!
I do not know my name, but you may call me, “A.B. Leever.”
I may call you “A.B.,” but that is not your name? I do not understand. “A.B.” is the name that I am called by now, but that is only temporary. My real name is hidden in God. He has named me, but He has not told me my name yet.
You confound me, Sir! I would simply like to know who you are, I do not wish to be convoluted with all this mumbo jumbo!
My apologies, friend. May I ask you your name?
Hey! Why do you expect that I know my name when you do not know yours? Perhaps, as is the truth for the vast majority of human beings, the eternal God does not have a name for you. It is quite likely that your earthly name given you by your parents is the only name that you will ever know. Do you know that God has a new name for you?
Well, not for absolutely certain. What does it matter? It is a subject for another time, perhaps. How would you like to be called?
You may call me, “D.W.” A pleasure to meet you, D.W. And who are you?
I just told you, A.B. ! I am D.W.! Well, you are called D.W., but that is not who you are. What is your identity? What makes you, you, D.W.? Is it merely the name given you by your parents? Is it the type of work that you do? Is it the members of your family? Who are you?
Hmmm. I’ve never given this much thought I suppose. I work in the Church, mostly speaking, a bit of counseling, some administrative stuff. You know, typical minister type. Yes, I know. So you are primarily identified by your work?
Well, my work could change … that is not really who I am. I am also married and have three children, and I suppose I would still be a husband and a father even if I left the ministry. I suppose I could define my identity in my wife and children. Yes, I suppose you could. Is this the substance of who you are?
I am not sure. I guess, my wife could leave me and take the kids … she has threatened to a few times … Yet, for now anyway, I suppose these two things, my work and my family, describe what keeps me busy, mostly. Are you then drawing your identity from what you do?
This does not seem right either, come to think of it. Who am I? I am D.W. Jr., son of D.W. Senior who was a lawyer, who was the son of K.L. a great chemist, and his father was S.T., a famous college president. I could go on if you like. I have an awesome bloodline! So you are who you are because of your ancestry?
This still seems off. Some people are great regardless of their parents and background, and some are loosers even though they come from great families. Ancestry really doesn’t mean that much. Well, my congregation loves me and they’re always raving about my sermons. I am a great preacher and do a lot of good in the community. I am loved and respected all over town. I guess that makes me significant, doesn’t it?That makes me who I am! Great people are not always recognized for who they are, and some men are perceived as great because they do not let anyone know who they really are.
Jesus Christ was hated by his own people, was mocked by His own brothers and sisters, was misunderstood by His closest friends, was betrayed by a trusted disciple, and died homeless and alone… being quite largely rejected by the culture and world in which He lived. Doesn’t sound like he would measure up under your idea of greatness, yet I would say He is the most significant Person that ever lived.
Good point. Hmmm. What really does give me significance? What makes me what I am? I think that is a good question D.W. Who or what gives you identity, D.W.?
Well, God, I suppose. True enough. And what identity has he given to you D.W.?
I am not sure. How am I different from the next guy, as far as God is concerned? Must you be unique to have identity, D.W.?
Well, I suppose not. Who are you, A.B.? I am, essentially, a loved child of the eternal God, who is in love with Him.
I figured you would say something trite like that! Trite? How so?
It tells me nothing about you! I want to get to know you so I have asked who you are. I want to know something of your background, what you like, what you do not like, where you are headed, what you are about … You know? I see. And my response, this is not what you are after? It does not tell you who I am?
No, it really doesn’t. Well, it tells you what and who I love and why I am alive. I am alive both physically and spiritually to be in love with God, and to be actually loving Him in each moment of my existence. This is What and Who I love above all else, and What I will continue to love above all else. Loving Him and being loved by Him is the substance of what I am, it is what drives me inside, it is what motivates all that I think, do and say.
Loving Him does not give me significance, however. Nothing that I can be or do can create or add to my significance. There is only one self-significant Being and that is God. Only He can define and give significance. I have significance because He loves me. Nothing else makes me important or significant, not even my love for Him.
In the eyes of men this is not clear, for men esteem the straw as gold, and the dust as silver. A man thinks he is significant if other men admire him or love him, or if he has great wealth, and he thus takes the love of God as a thing of naught. Yet those things which are highly esteemed among men are abomination in the sight of God. To be admired and loved by sinful men, or to be wealthy, does not give one significance. Only the love of God can do this.
I do think that my statement to you, that I am a loved child of the eternal God and that I am in love with Him, I think that this is all that I can say to you about who I really am.
Well, then, “Loved child of the eternal God, who is in love with Him,” a pleasure to meet you! Likewise, D.W.
So then, “Loved child of the eternal God, who is in love with Him,” what do you do for a living? I pray.
I who drip with foulest sin
My darkened path I find so sweet
It pains my flesh to turn to You
To seek Your lovely face
To make love with You
Worldly care distracts with ease
and carnal flickers burn within my breast
While You find the stars impure
because they’ve shown their lights
upon my sin
While You turn with bitter hate from all of me
that e’er was laid upon your Son
and that is
ALL
I would call me …
Yet Your love for me would stretch my mind and heart beyond rebound
If You showed the full of it to me
I could never think or work again
for the longing I would have
to live only in this love of Yours
for me
And yet
even then
I fear
I would be moved
for only me
Your love makes me feel good
Somehow my love for You
for You
Yourself
is often sick and sad
I wrench with painful toil
to draw Your rich sweet words aflow within my mind
My heart
it breaks for want of human love
and will not turn to You with ease
I fear that others will disdain
and toss my comforts far from clenching hands
and so I walk to please them
You
I grieve you lightly,
because You are tender
gentle
patient with me.
Were it not for Your own dear Son
arising in my heart
I would be
a brute beast
made to be taken
and destroyed
Yet
You love me
It is amazing
Truly amazing
Perhaps…
Perhaps…
Perhaps this is yet more amazing…
perhaps the only equal
in awesome vastness
That I could be weak
in love
with You
For You
The altogether LOVELY
You
Who melts the hollow discord in my breast with Your sweet breath
You
Whose beauty makes the finest art a cursed thing
You
Whose wisdom and knowledge
wraps the mind with ecstasy
beyond the wildest dream
You
Whose song with rapture splits the fragile soul beyond repair
You
Who loves espous-ed spirits in eternal whirls of brilliant peace
Relentless happy chase of lovers in a wood
Of songs amid the sun
How You woo and draw this poor dim mortal
with heart-strung cords of fire light!
Ever loving … selfless …
waiting
waiting
waiting
waiting for me
to turn to You!
so You can bless
me with Your love
With one sweet touch You draw my disconnect and fragment from afar
to make me whole in You again