Touched With the Feeling

To say I hate the way western civilization has emasculated men, trying to turn us into women, is an understatement. In struggling with my own confidence, masculinity and identity as a man, Feminism demanding we “get in touch with our emotions” while rejecting our competence and strength hasn’t helped, to say the least.

In pursing healthy masculinity, trying to understand God’s design for men and looking for His perfect standard, I need not look very far at all: the perfect Man, the Prophet-Priest-Warrior-King, lives inside and beckons me onward in my journey.

God has already made me both a king and a priest (Re 5:10), inducting me into an holy, royal priesthood (1Pe 2:5, 9), so Christ’s kingly, priestly qualities are to imbue my manhood.

A central quality of a kingly priest is compassion for those who are ignorant, who have lost their way. (He 5:1-2) Godly masculine love for others should be always looking for how best to encourage and edify them in their connection with God. (2Co 5:18-20) This not only requires me to be closely connected with God myself, but to carefully observe the needs of others and meet them where they’re at.

My example here is Christ Himself, of course, my great High Priest (He 4:14), Who knows me intimately and is always praying for me. (He 7:25) He has not only personally experienced the deepest traumas, temptations and suffering life can offer (He 4:15b), enabling Him to empathize with me, He is Personally touched with the feeling of (my) infirmities. (He 4:15a) This key phrase translates sympatheō, implying a deep, visceral sympathy or co-suffering; it’s not mere pity from afar; it’s an empathetic resonance where He feels the weight of my weaknesses as if they are His own, rooted in shared experience with me.

In other words, Christ is so in touch with His own feelings, so emotionally intelligent and connected, so secure in Himself, that He so fully acknowledges my feelings and connects with them that He invites me in my joy and pain into shared emotional experience with Himself; He allows the feelings of my personal ups and downs into His own heart and lets me touch Him where it’s real, where it matters most.

Father God is not afraid of my pain, of my fears, of my feelings of inadequacy; He knows all there is to know about me. (Ps 139:1-4) In knowing me and loving me, He is inviting me to know myself, and to love myself, to become more like Him, emotionally intelligent and free, not controlled by emotions, but embracing, embodying and mastering them for His glory.

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Being Confident

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I have often struggled with self-confidence, insecurity, feeling tense, uneasy, routinely second-guessing my abilities, decisions and beliefs. I don’t admire this quality, either in myself or others. I’ve wondered how to develop godly self-confidence.

What exactly is self-confidence? We might define it as a feeling of certainty, assurance, strength and peace when making decisions, resulting in a humble assertiveness, boldness, decisiveness and stability. It’s evidently on a spectrum; there are degrees of confidence. And it might also vary within the same person in different scenarios; we might feel confident in some contexts and not others.

If we look for godly examples and mentors, we should first meditate on the ultimate embodiment of self-confidence: Jesus Christ. As a man, He was so supremely confident it was astonishing to those who experienced Him. (Mt 7:28-29)

The opposite of self-confidence is evidently unbelieffear and doubt: fear of failure, fear of Man, wanting to please others (Ga 1:10), fear of being mocked, persecuted, disrespected or excluded from relationships. (1Jn 4:18) This is ultimately grounded in mistrusting God. (Is 26:3)

We can have confidence in our physical and/or intellectual abilities, skills and knowledge, and in our interpersonal skills in navigating complex relationships and social contexts, and in our relationship with God Himself. (2Co 5:6-7) Since they relate to different life dimensions we ought to treat each area differently.

Confidence in our abilities and skills may be developed by disciplining and training ourselves, learning about our aptitudes and pushing ourselves to become stronger and more capable. (Pr 22:29, Ps 18:34) Knowing ourselves through experience is evidently the key to this type of self-confidence.

And we should note that developing such confidence is godly. Refusing to acknowledge, appreciate, develop and leverage the gifts God has graciously given us to serve Him is to sin against both Wisdom and Love. (Ep 4:7-8, Ja 1:17)  Neglecting them is generally grounded in ungodly fear (2Ti 1:7), which despises God Himself. (Mt 25:24-26)

Confidence in interpersonal contexts may be mere presumption, assuming we’re right because we hate being wrong, but this is pride, an abomination to God (Pr 16:5), thinking more highly of ourselves than we ought. (Ga 6:3) The fear of God shuts this down (Pr 9:10), moving us to consider differing points of view and learn from others (Ja 1:19), without doubting our own ability to know and rest in the truth (1Jn 2:21) because we trust God to reveal it to us. (1Jn 2:20)

So, how do we know what to say or do in a given relational circumstance? If we cannot control how others will respond (and we can’t), and we’re not to be primarily concerned with what others think of us (1Co 4:3), or to assume we’re right by default (1Co 8:2), how then can we be confident we’re doing/saying the right thing, at the right time, in the right way?

It must come down to motive. The fact is, when we’re serving others in love and wisdom rather than in foolishness and selfishness, we fulfill the ultimate moral law. (Ro 13:10) Second-guessing this is to sin against the highest good. If we’re aligned with Love, and thus aligned with God Himself (1Jn 4:8), what is there to be afraid of, regardless of the outcome? (1Jn 4:18) Even if we miss the mark on occasion, at least it isn’t moral failure — it’s a growth opportunity: it’s nothing to fear because we’re building on a solid foundation. (Mt 7:24-25)

Christ-like confidence is thus grounded in proving what is that good, and acceptable and perfect will of God (Ro 12:2), and then doing God’s will, prayerfully trusting He will manage the outcome as He wills. (Php 4:6-7) It is trusting God is at work in us (Php 2:13), that He’s empowering us (2Co 3:4-5), and that He will continue to do so. (Php 1:6)

How then do we know whether we’re walking in wisdom and love? We must be observant, studying ourselves, noticing our motives, how we’re feeling and thinking and what we’re ultimately pursuing. Through healthy introspection we keep asking God to search us and know us, revealing the deepest places of our inner selves to us, exposing all which is not Wisdom and Love (Ps 139:23-24), trusting Him to heal us (2Ti 2:25-26) and give us more wisdom (Ja 1:5) and love. (Php 1:9)

Knowing our gifts and calling are from God, and that He expects us to actively engage them in glorifying Him, heals weakness, timidity and indecision. We’re reminded that our worthiness isn’t self-earned but received from God (1Co 4:7), and that we are secure in Him (Re 1:5-6), freeing us to accept ourselves (Ep 1:6) and satisfying our need for validation and affirmation. (1Th 2:4)

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Searching All the Inward Parts

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In our hectic, turbulent, broken world, many are looking for ways to cope with stress, fear, trauma, depression, anger, loneliness and addictions, chasing after inner-healing through various fads, trends, ancient mystic rituals, or self-help techniques. Yet Scripture reveals a simpler, organic, coherent and integrated path: God’s gift of cleansing breath, a profound, natural rhythm for aligning body, mind, soul, and spirit into authentic wholeness.

God has created our soul and spirit, the parts of our being making us fully human, by breathing into us (Ge 2:7), and it is primarily by breathing that our own soul and spirit sustain our body to keep it alive. As breathing in provides life-sustaining oxygen to our body, and as breathing out removes carbon dioxide and other toxins, we may find a parallel in leveraging our natural breathing for our spiritual healing and cleansing.

The idea is simple, discovered in the following text: The spirit of man is the candle of Jehovah, searching all the inward parts of the belly.” (Pr 20:27) The word translated spirit here is neshamah (נְשָׁמָה), which more directly means “breath,” “breathing,” or “life-breath” and is closely tied to the act of breathing itself, or the breath of life; it’s the same word used in Creation: “…and breathed into his nostrils the breath [neshamah] of life; and man became a living soul.” (Ge 2:7)

The text says in effect that our spirit-breathing is Jehovah’s candle: a candle provides light in the darkness, enabling Him to see, and the text says He uses it to search, evidently with the intent to explore and discover something. Yet why would God search for anything when He already knows everything? And why would He use a candle to aid His searching when the darkness and the light are both alike to Him? (Ps 139:11-12) And why would He use our breathing, the very life-pulse of our human spirit which He Himself creates, as His candle to achieve this?

And what exactly is God searching through? What is He exploring? The verse tells us; it is: “All the inward parts of the belly” — the deepest places of our spiritual, mental and emotional framework, and all of the mysterious metaphysical interconnections between our metaphysical and physical bodies. God actually possesses (is intimately connected with) our reins (literally, kidneys, the most hidden places of our being, Ps 139:13); He is evidently keenly interested in and leverages these intricate relationships as He sanctifies and cleanses us. 

God evidently searches through and explores these deep places within us through and within our breathing, directed by our spirit, as He works within our wills both to will and to do according to His good pleasure (Php 2:13), inspecting our entire, integrated spirit-soul-mind-body along with us, searching for anything which is misaligned with His living Word (He 4:12), exposing any darkness which needs to be cleaned up, rooted out, and realigning every part of us with Himself. As we breathe deliberately and focus prayerfully, God invites us to become co-laborers together with Himself (1Co 3:9), inspecting ourselves in God and with God, as He guides us to sanctify and cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God. (2Co 7:1

To put this into practice and benefit from God’s design, we may define any kind of breathing technique which fits this general pattern and relies solely on our personal interconnection with the living God. We might sit or lie, quietly resting (Ps 46:10), and inhale — conscious of symbolically drawing in the divine life of the Spirit of Christ (Jn 20:22), hold our breath while asking God to probe along with us for anomalies, and exhale — symbolically relieving stress, lies, worries and thanking God for forgiveness, freedom and deliverance. (Ga 1:4)

And rather than meditating on nothing (as many evidently do, emptying our minds 1Pe 1:13) to let the enemy in like a flood 2Co 2:11), or using our mental focus to meticulously count and measure our breathing itself, we should actively and intentionally use our minds to integrate scripture meditation into our breathwork (Ps 119:97), wielding the sword of the Spirit as we engage (Ep 6:17), focusing on God’s nature and His truth, noting anything within us stirring contrary to Him in the slightest way. (Ps 139:23-24)

Praying in the Spirit through breathing sessions (Ju 20-21, Job 27:3), saturated with the Word of God (Co 3:16), always studying our emotional and physical responses, relying on the Spirit to guide us into all truth (Jn 16:13), what should we expect as a result? Deeper discipline, better mental, spiritual and physical health, freedom from hidden soul-wounds, and grounded, unshakable alignment with God’s design.

Whenever we pursue healing—whether from trauma, stress, or sin—wisdom approaches it holistically: true restoration touches body (temple of the Holy Spirit), mind (renewed thoughts), soul (emotions and will), and spirit (connection to God), bringing all into harmonious alignment. (1Th 5:23)

Paul embodies and exemplifies how he leverages this spirit-body connection in his own pursuit of discipline, wholeness and holiness: “But I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection: lest that by any means, when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway.” (1Co 9:27) His “keeping under” is a purposeful training, like an athlete building strength through voluntary, self-imposed, well-placed challenges. Focused, prayerful breathing exercises offer us another tool, a natural, biblical way to practice this spiritual subjugation of the physical body. By introducing mild, intermittent breath holds—creating a controlled cycle of alternating oxygen saturation and deficit—we train the body to relax under stress, improve metabolic efficiency, and submit to the soul’s God-directed will.

This mirrors God’s pattern of faithful, measured trials. (1Co 10:13). In focused breathing, the gentle tribulation of a breath hold builds a type of bodily, neurological patience and hope through repeating, rhythmic patterns of stress and relief, similar to how God strengths us through trial. (Ro 5:3-5) With each breathing cycle, the body relearns trust, the mind stays present, and the soul rests in God’s deliverance.

Even God’s chastening follows the same, wise pattern: “Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.” (He 12:11) These breathing techniques “exercise” us gently—never overdone, always with discernment—yielding peaceable fruit. As we mature, repeated experiences of God’s faithfulness transcend suffering, teaching us self-control on the deepest levels, producing wholeness where body relaxes, mind renews, soul restores, and our spirits abide in Him. (1Jn 2:28)

And as one begins to engage in this design, a powerful benefit unfolds during the breath hold: a natural body scan. We can focus intently on our body and how it is responding, especially during the stillness of the breath hold, sensing our heartbeat, our energy, our peace. Traumas may have lodged in specific areas of our body: envy rotting the bones (Pr 14:30), guilt, grief and anxiety burdening our bowels and agitating our bones (Ps 38:3-8), deceit infecting our heart (Je 17:9), hardening and weakening our emotional core, making it callous and insensitive. (Mk 3:5) This isn’t perfect peace, indicating mistrust of God, being out of sync with God. (Is 26:3) As sensations arise—tightness in the chest, knots in the gut, tension in the shoulders—our breath, entwined with our spirit, is God‘s candle, illuminating hidden disconnects between mind, body, soul and spirit.

Here, awareness becomes a window into prayerful healing. As disturbances surface, we explore: “Why am I feeling nervous, panic, anxiety, tension, resentment, bitterness, anger?” (Ps 77:3) Then we look for the embedded lies and renounce them: “Casting down imaginations… bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ” (2Co 10:4-5). We find repentance to replace darkness with light, deceit with truth, and deliver ourselves from the snare of the enemy. (2Ti 2:25-26) We invite Jehovah Father God to heal us, to restore our soul and lead us in the paths of righteousness for His name’s sake, one sanctifying step at a time. (Ps 23:3)

This isn’t about redeeming corrupt Eastern practices, which fragment the human experience into isolated energy centers (e.g. chakras), or mindlessly chanting mantras to connect with an impersonal spirit of the universe. This is reality itself: the Spirit of the living God quickening our mortal body in real time (Ro 8:11), cleansing and sanctifying us with the washing of water by the Word (Ep 5:26-27), shedding light and love abroad and within us to realign every fragmented, disconnected, broken part of our being. (Ro 5:3) It’s reclaiming precious facets of Jehovah God’s original blueprint for us, where His own life-giving breath infuses and nourishes every part of us. From the very beginning, breath bridges the physical (dust/body) and the spiritual (living soul), and He continues this creative work within us today. (Job 33:4)

This is natural, biblical wholeness—body, mind, soul, and spirit unified in Christ. Breathe in the breath of God, inhaling and exhaling with purpose and intention (Eze 37:5), leveraging it to train ourselves in trust, grateful for each new breath as if it were our first, the free gift of God, ever mindful of how our entire being is lovingly and intricately interconnected with Him (Ac 17:28), and step into all the fullness Father God has intended for us from the beginning. (Ep 3:19)

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Help My Unbelief

What should we do when we’re doubting our salvation? When we’re not 100% sure we’ll go to Heaven when we die? We still believe Jesus Christ existed, that He died and rose again to save us all from our sins, but deep down inside we remain uncertain, worried about where we’ll spend eternity? (2Pe 1:10)

Salvation is by grace, the power of God enabling us to have faith in Christ (Ep 2:8), to receive Him and believe on Him (Jn 1:12-13), that He died for us individually (1Co 15:3), personally, that He became sin for us so that we might be made the righteousness of God in Him. (2Co 5:21) If we’re doubting our salvation, it’s because we’re not convinced He has done this work for us, that He has paid our sin debt to God and completely satisfied God on our behalf. (Is 53:11) Why might this be? What can we do about it? (Mk 9:24)

There are two main root causes, which we can overcome in God. (1Jn 5:4)

Firstly, we may not understand the Gospel itself. (2Co 4:3) There are many perversions of the Gospel; they sound like the truth on the surface but are mixed up and diluted with lies and half-truths. For example, we may have been taught Christ died for everyone, but that His death actually saves no one, that He only makes it possible for us to be saved if we do such and such.

There are many versions of this particular lie, but they’re all missing the main point: Christ saves us by dying for us: this is how He justifies us and makes us right with God. (Is 53:5-6, 11) Everyone Christ dies for is immediately, completely and permanently justified before God because of what He has done for them. (Ro 5:9-10) No one can be saved any other way. (Ac 4:12) This is the only way anyone can be right with God.

Since very few are saved (Mt 7:14), it is evident that Christ has not died for everyone in this way; His atoning death is certainly available to everyone to trust in (1Jn 2:2), but He has not paid for everyone’s sins (or then everyone would be saved). The key is to become convinced Jesus has died for us and paid for our sins. Something is blocking our hearts from believing this simple truth (2Co 4:4), blinding us so we won’t come to Christ and be saved. (Jn 5:40) This is something only God can do in us (Mk 10:26-27), but He does promise to do this for us as we diligently seek Him. (He 11:6)

The other root cause of unbelief is sin, which is breaking God’s Law. (1Jn 3:4) When we continue in willful disobedience to God we are not seeking God; rather, we grieve and anger God (Ro 1:18) and deceive ourselves (Ja 1:22); we lie to ourselves and corrupt our ability to perceive the truth. (He 3:13) Even true believers who are not careful to pursue holiness can forget that we were purged from our sins. (2Pe 1:5-9) We deliver ourselves from spiritual captivity (unbelief) when we repent and acknowledge the truth (2Ti 2:25-26) and live accordingly. (Ja 1:21)

We overcome spiritual darkness and unbelief by seeking the truth and obeying it as best we can. (Jn 8:32) We recognize where we are violating God’s law and turn away from this pattern of life, choosing to obey God to the best of our ability. (1Jn 3:8-10) We memorize and meditate on scriptures that explain the Gospel from many angles and perspectives. We saturate our minds and hearts with these truths and prayerfully ask God to open our eyes (Ac 26:18), give us faith (Ep 2:8) and spiritual life. (Ps 119:107) As we earnestly pursue God in this way, He helps us find Him and believe on Him unto everlasting life. (Mt 7:7-8, Je 29:13)

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